Welcome back to Finally Am Found!
This week, we’re kicking off our series on relationships in young adulthood with a topic close to everyone’s heart: friendships. Remember those carefree days spent with your best buds, building forts, sharing secrets, and navigating the awkwardness of middle school together? While friendships remain vital in young adulthood, they take on a new dimension. We’re no longer just hanging out; we’re building a support system that will navigate life’s challenges and celebrate its victories alongside us. Enjoy these illustrations:
Friendships in the Park
The bustling city park was a microcosm of relationships, each one a unique story waiting to unfold. Under the shade of a giant oak, Wangui and Theodore, childhood friends reunited, remembered the Nyama-Nyama-Nyama game with nostalgia and put their “friendship hack” into practice. They’d mastered the art of the “busy bee check-in” – a quick call or video chat every other week to stay connected despite their hectic schedules. Their conversation, a familiar melody of laughter and shared updates flowed effortlessly.
Across the path, a young couple, Sarah and Lethabo, were on their first official date. Sarah, ever the planner, had employed a clever “conversation starter hack.” She’d created a jar filled with prompts about hopes, dreams, and dealbreakers, turning what could have been awkward silences into opportunities for genuine connection. Their intertwined fingers spoke volumes about the tentative trust and budding intimacy that bound them.
On a nearby swing set, a grandfather playfully pushed his granddaughter, Lily, a “laughter hack” master. He’d incorporated silly voices and exaggerated sound effects into their playtime, transforming routine moments into bursts of giggles. Their relationship was a mosaic made with love, patience, and a shared sense of wonder. He recounted fantastical stories in a voice raspy with age, while she listened with wide eyes, her imagination ignited by his words. Theirs was a bond built on unwavering love and the joy of shared experiences across generations.
Rebuilding Connections
A lone figure sat on a park bench feeding the pigeons, Mr. Aayansh, a retired tailor. His relationship with his grown children was strained. He yearned to reconnect, and after reading an article on “apology hacks,” he’d drafted a heartfelt letter expressing his regret. Though nervous, he knew it was a step towards healing the rift. His solitude, once a symbol of disconnect, now simmered with a flicker of hope.
Finding Belonging
Across the walkway, Mrs. Mobolaji, a recent immigrant, sat on a bench feeling overwhelmed by the unfamiliar city. But then, a friendly face approached. It was Ms Dalia, her neighbour from across the street, known for her “neighbourhood welcome hack.” Ms. Dalia, sensing Mrs. Mobolaji’s isolation, had baked a batch of her famous nankhatai cookies and invited her for tea. As they chatted about their families and cultures, a connection blossomed. Mrs. Mobolaji no longer felt alone; she had found a friendly face and a sense of belonging in her new community.
The Essence of Human Connection
As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting long shadows across the park, these seemingly disparate stories intertwined. Each relationship, whether budding or strained, represented a vital connection in human life. They were a reminder that we are all social creatures, wired for connection and that the journey of life is best navigated with the support and love of others. The park, like a small world that reflects the dynamics of life, whispered a silent truth. Relationships, in all their complexity and beauty, are what truly make life a meaningful adventure. And with a little creativity and effort, we can all strengthen the connections that matter most.
The Power of Strong Friendships
Friendships in young adulthood are more than just fun times. Strong friendships offer a sense of belonging, acceptance, and unconditional love. Our friends challenge us to grow, celebrate our successes, and offer a shoulder to cry on during tough times. They can be our confidants, our cheerleaders, and even our occasional reality checks. Studies have shown that having strong social connections can improve mental and physical well-being, so nurturing our friendships is an investment in our overall happiness and productivity.
Communication is Key
Effective communication is the lifeblood of any relationship, and friendships are no exception. In young adulthood, busy schedules and changing priorities can make it harder to stay connected. But scheduling regular catch-ups, whether in person or virtually, makes a big difference. Open and honest communication allows you to share your feelings, listen to your friends’ concerns, and build trust within your friendship circle.
In all relationships, always ensure respect. There may be times when you don’t feel like taking a phone call. When you’re ready to call back, there’s no need to provide a lengthy list of excuses for which you may be lying. Simply say, “I wasn’t able to.” Remember, honesty and clarity are vital in maintaining healthy communication. By being upfront about your availability, you show consideration for the other person’s time and feelings. It’s a simple gesture that can go a long way in nurturing strong and respectful relationships. Don’t be afraid to express your needs and be there for your friends too.
What about Romantic Relationships
These relationships can be exciting, confusing, and everything in between, especially at this age. First love can be intense and passionate, filled with “butterflies” and the thrill of new connections. However, most people seek partners who respect their independence and individuality. To get into the right and genuine relationship, you must know yourself better. You need to understand who you are, your values and beliefs, your personality, and your boundaries. Understand your emotions, and explore your passions, hobbies, and life goals. A strong sense of self attracts healthier connections and helps you be more aware of red flags early on.
Building Fulfilling Relationships
Finding someone who complements your personality and shares similar values can lead to a fulfilling and long-lasting relationship. Communication and mutual respect are key in navigating the ups and downs of a romantic relationship. Remember to prioritize your happiness and well-being, and don’t be afraid to walk away from a relationship that doesn’t serve you. Trust your instincts and never settle for anything less than you deserve. Love should uplift and inspire you, bringing out the best version of yourself.
As you continue to explore the realm of romantic relationships, keep in mind that growth and change are natural parts of life. Embrace the ebbs and flows of love, allowing yourself to evolve alongside your partner. Vulnerability and open communication foster deeper connections and understanding within a relationship. Remember that it’s okay to be imperfect and to make mistakes, as long as you are willing to learn and grow from them. Cherish the moments of joy and support, and weather the storms together with resilience and empathy. Love is a journey of self-discovery and shared experiences, where both individuals have the opportunity to flourish and thrive in the warmth of a caring and genuine connection.
Saying No to Relationships
But when not ready for relationships, say NO (young ladies), this is how you can express it: Maintain good posture, make eye contact, and speak in a clear, firm voice. This non-verbal communication reinforces your message and projects confidence. Use these empowering responses: “That’s not my style, thanks though!” or “Actually, I have plans already.” or “I’m not comfortable with that.” (followed by a confident change of subject like financial investments).
For young men: “I appreciate you asking, but we are not there yet. I prefer we go and watch a movie.” or “That sounds like fun, however, I have goals to achieve.” or “I understand why you’d want to do that, but I am in the process of figuring out what I want.” The goal is to communicate effectively and confidently while setting healthy boundaries and respecting each other’s choices.
The Challenges We Face
Let’s be honest, navigating friendships in young adulthood isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. Disagreements happen, schedules clash, and sometimes you might even outgrow certain friendships. The key is to approach challenges with maturity and empathy. Can you communicate your needs and find common ground? If not, it might be time to let go and focus on nurturing other friendships that offer better support for your current life stage. Remember, true friends will respect your boundaries and celebrate your growth.
The Takeaway
Strong friendships are essential for a fulfilling life in young adulthood. By prioritizing communication, staying connected, and navigating challenges with maturity, you can cultivate a supportive network of friends who will be there for you through thick and thin.
Call to Action
Jesus modelled humility, service, and forgiveness in his interactions with others. These qualities should guide how we treat those around us. What are some of the ways you maintain strong friendships in young adulthood? Share your tips and experiences in the comments below! We’d love to hear from you.
Prayer
Dear God,
I lift up myself, a young adult navigating the complexities of love and relationships. Grant me wisdom and discernment as I explore my feelings and desires. Guide me towards partners who share my values and respect my boundaries. Fill my heart with the courage to be true to myself and the strength to walk away from situations that don’t feel right. Reflect in me clear communication skills, allowing me to express my needs and desires with confidence. May I learn to listen with an open mind and a kind heart. Help me navigate the inevitable challenges that come with relationships. Grant me the patience to work through disagreements and the strength to forgive. May I find joy in the journey of love, even amidst the ups and downs. Surround me with supportive friends and family who offer guidance and encouragement. I pray that your love may be the foundation of all my relationships, both romantic and platonic. May I experience the beauty of connection and the power of healthy, supportive bonds.
In Christ’s name, I pray.
Amen.
Hey, I’m Angeline, your RN and founder of Finally Am Found. With a heart for mentorship, I’ve been guiding teens and young adults since 2017. As a Registered Nurse, I blend medical expertise with personal experiences to create a Christ-aligned space for self-discovery. Connect with Angeline on Facebook and let the journey to self-discovery begin!
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